Sahifa Sajjadiya 12: Confession and Seeking Repentance

أَللَّهُمَّ إنَّهُ يَحْجُبُنِي عَنْ مَسْأَلَتِكَ خِلاَلٌ ثَلاثٌ

al-laahum-ma in-nahoo yah'-jubunee a'm-mas-alatika khilaalun thalaath wa tah'-doonee a'lay-haa khal-latoo-waah'idah

O God, three traits have prevented me from asking Thee

وَتَحْدُونِي عَلَيْهَا خَلَّةٌ وَاحِدَةٌ ،

and one trait has urged me on:

يَحْجُبُنِي أَمْرٌ أَمَرْتَ بِهِ فَأَبْطَأتُ عَنْهُ،

yah'-jubunee am-run amar-ta bihee faab-t'aa-tu a'n-h

I am prevented by a command Thou hast commanded in which I have been slow,

وَنَهْيٌ نَهَيْتَنِي عَنْهُ فَأَسْرَعْتُ إلَيْهِ،

wa nah-yun-nahay-tanee a'n-hoo faas-raa'-tu ilay-h

a prohibition Thou hast prohibited toward which I have hurried,

وَنِعْمَةٌ أَنْعَمْتَ بِهَا عَلَيَّ فَقَصَّرْتُ فِي شُكْرِهَـا.

wa nia'-matun an-a'm-ta bihaa a'lay-ya faqas'-s'ar-tu fee shuk-rihaa

and a favour through which Thou hast favoured for which I have not given sufficient thanks.

وَيَحْدُونِي عَلَى مَسْأَلَتِكَ تَفَضُّلُكَ

wa yah'-doonee a'laa mas-alatika tafaz''-z''uluka

I am urged to ask Thee by Thy gratuitous bounty

عَلَى مَنْ أَقْبَلَ بِوَجْهِهِ إلَيْكَ،

a'laa man aq-bala biwaj-hiheee ilay-k

upon him who turns his face toward Thee

وَوَفَدَ بِحُسْنِ ظَنِّـهِ إلَيْكَ،

wa wafada bih'us-ni z'an-niheee ilay-k

and comes to Thee with a good opinion,

إذْ جَمِيعُ إحْسَانِكَ تَفَضُّلٌ،

id' jameeu' ih'-saanika tafaz''-z''ul

since all Thy beneficence is gratuitous bounty

وَإذْ كُلُّ نِعَمِكَ ابْتِدَاءٌ.

wa id' kul-lu nia'mika ab-tidaaa-

and every one of Thy favours a new beginning!

فَهَا أَنَا ذَا يَا إلهِيْ وَاقِفٌ بِبَابِ عِزِّكَ

fahaaa ana d'aa yaaa ilaahee waaqifum-bibaabi i'z-zika

So here I am, my God, standing at the gate of Thy might,

وُقُوفَ المُسْتَسْلِمِ الذَّلِيْل، وَسَائِلُكَ عَلَى الْحَيَاءِ مِنّي

wqoofal-mus-tas-limid'-d'aleel wa saaa-iluka a'laal-h'ayaaa-i min-nee

the standing of the lowly, the surrendered, asking Thee in my shame,

سُؤَالَ الْبَائِسِ الْمُعِيْلِ. مُقـرٌّ لَكَ بأَنّي

soo-aalal-baaa-isil-mue'el muqir-rul-laka bin-nee

the asking of the destitute, the pitiful, admitting to Thee that

لَمْ أَسْتَسْلِمْ وَقْتَ إحْسَانِـكَ إلاَّ بِالاِقْلاَعِ عَنْ عِصْيَانِكَ،

lam as-tas-lim waq-ta ih'-saanika il-laa bil-iq-laai' a'n i's'-yaanik

at the time of Thy beneficence I surrendered not save through abstaining from disobedience toward Thee

وَلَمْ أَخْلُ فِي الْحَالاتِ كُلِّهَا مِنِ امْتِنَانِكَ.

wa lam akh-lu fil-h'aalaati kul-lihaa mini am-tinaanik

and in none of my states was I ever without Thy Kindness.

فَهَلْ يَنْفَعُنِي يَا إلهِي إقْرَارِي عِنْدَكَ بِسُوءِ مَا اكْتَسَبْتُ؟

fahal yanfau'nee yaaa ilaaheee iq-raaree i'ndaka bisooo-i mak-tasab-tu ? 6- Will it profit me, my God, to admit to Thee the evil of what I have earned?

Will my confession before You, O my God, of the evil that I have earned benefit me?

وَهَلْ يُنْجِيْنِي مِنْكَ اعْتِرَافِي لَكَ بِقَبِيْحِ مَا ارْتَكَبْتُ؟

Will it save me from Thee to confess the ugliness of what I have done?

أَمْ أَوْجَبْتَ لِي فِي مَقَامِي هَذَا سُخْطَكَ؟

am aw-jab-ta lee fee maqaamee had'aa sukh-t'aka?

Or wilt Thou impose upon me in this my stationThy displeasure?

أَمْ لَزِمَنِي فِي وَقْتِ دُعَائِي مَقْتُكَ؟

am lazimanee fee waq-ti dua'aa-ee maq-tuka?

Will Thy hate hold fast to me in the time of my supplication?

سُبْحَانَكَ! لاَ أَيْأَسُ مِنْكَ وَقَدْ فَتَحْتَ لِيَ بَابَ التَّوْبَةِ إلَيْكَ،

sub-h'aanaka laaa ay-asu minka waqad fatah'-ta lee baabat-taw-bati ilay-k

Glory be to Thee! I do not despair of Thee, for Thou hast opened the door of repentance toward Thyself.

بَلْ أَقُولُ مَقَالَ الْعَبْدِ الذَّلِيلِ الظَّالِمِ لِنَفْسِهِ

bal aqoolu maqaalal-a'b-did'-d'aleeli az'-z'aalimi linaf-sih

Rather, I say, the words of a lowly servant, having wronged himself

الْمُسْتَخِفِّ بِحُرْمَةِ رَبِّهِ

al-mus-takhif-fi bih'ur-mati rab-bih

and made light of his Lord's inviolability,

الَّذِي عَظُمَتْ ذُنُوبُهُ فَجَلَّتْ وَأَدْبَرَتْ أَيّامُهُ فَوَلَّتْ

al-lad'ee a'z'umat d'unoobuhoo fajal-lat-wa ad-barat ay-yaamuhoo fawal-lat-

and whose sins are dreadful, great,whose days have parted, fled,

حَتَّى إذَا رَأى مُدَّةَ الْعَمَلِ قَدِ انْقَضَتْ

h'at-taaa id'aa raaa mud-datal-a'mali qadi anqaz''at

until, when he sees the term of his works expired and the limit of his lifetime reached

وَغَايَةَ الْعُمُرِ قَدِ انْتَهَتْ ،

wa ghaayatal-u'muri qadi antahat

and knows with certainty that he has no escape from Thee,

وَأَيْقَنَ أَنَّهُ لا مَحيصَ لَهُ مِنْكَ ،وَلاَ مَهْرَبَ لَهُ عَنْكَ

wa ay-qana an-nahoo laa mah'ees'a lahoo mink wa laa mah-raba lahoo a'nk

no place to flee from Thee, he turns his face toward Thee in repeated turning,

تَلَقَّاكَ بِالإنَابَةِ ،وَأَخْلَصَ لَكَ التَّوْبَةَ

talaq-qaaka bil-inaabah wa akh-las'a lakat-taw-bah

makes his repentance toward Thee sincere,

، فَقَامَ إلَيْكَ بِقَلْبِ طَاهِر نَقِيٍّ

faqaama ilay-ka biqal-bin t'aahirin-naqee

stands before Thee with a pure and purified heart,t

ثُمَّ دَعَاكَ بِصَوْتٍ حَائِلٍ خَفِيٍّ،

Thumma daʿāka bi-ṣawtin ḥāʾilin khafiyyin

hen supplicates Thee with a feeble, quiet voice.

قَدْ تَطَأطَأَ لَكَ فَانْحَنى، وَنَكَّسَ رَأسَهُ فَانْثَنَى ،

qad t-tat'aa-t'aa laka fan-h'anaawa nak-kasa raa-sahoo faanthanaa

He is bowed before Thee, bent,his head lowered, thrown down,

قَدْ أَرْعَشَتْ خَشْيَتُهُ رِجْلَيْهِ، وَغَرَّقَتْ دُمُوعُهُ خَدَّيْهِ ،

qad sr-a'shat khash-yatuhoo rij-lay-h wa ghar-raqat d-dumoou'hoo khad-day-h

his legs shaking in fear,his tears flooding his cheeks.

يَدْعُوكَ بِيَا أَرْحَمَ الرَّاحِمِينَ وَيَا أَرْحَمَ مَنِ انْتَابَهُ الْمُسْتَرْحِمُونَ،

yad-u'wka beeaaa ar-h'amar-raah'imeen wa yaaa ar-h'ama mani antaabahul-mus-tar-h'imoon

He supplicates Thee: O Most Merciful of the merciful!O Most Merciful of those toward whom seekers of mercy keep on turning

وَيَا أَعْطَفَ مَنْ أَطَافَ بِهِ الْمُسْتَغْفِرُونَ ،

wa yaaa aa'-t'afa man at'aafa bihil-mus-tagh-firoon

O Tenderest of those around whom run seekers of forgiveness!

وَيَا مَنْ عَفْوُهُ أكْثَرُ مِنْ نِقْمَتِهِ،

wa yaa man a'f-wuhooo ak-tharu min-naqimatih

O He whose pardon is greater than His vengeance!

وَيَا مَنْ رِضَاهُ أَوْفَرُ مِنْ سَخَطِهِ،

wa yaa mar-riz''aahooo aw-faru min sakhat'ih

O He whose good pleasure is more abundant than His anger

وَيَا مَنْ تَحَمَّدَ إلَى خَلْقِهِ بِحُسْنِ التَّجاوُزِ ،

wa yaa man tah'am-mada ilaa khal-qihee bih'us-nit-tajaawuz

O He who seeks His creatures' praise with excellent forbearance!

وَيَا مَنْ عَوَّدَ عِبادَهُ قَبُولَ الإنَابَةِ ،

wa yaa man a'w-wada i'baadahoo qaboolal-inaabah

O He who has accustomed His servants to the acceptance of their repeated turning!

وَيَا مَنِ اسْتَصْلَحَ فَاسِدَهُمْ بِالتَّوْبَةِ

wa yaa mani as-tas'-lah'a faasidahum bit-taw-bah

O He who seeks to heal their corruption through repentance!

وَيَا مَنْ رَضِيَ مِنْ فِعْلِهِمْ بِالْيَسيرِ،

wa yaa mar-raz''eea min fia'-lihim bil-yaseer

O He who is pleased with the easy of their acts!

وَيَا مَنْ كَافى قَلِيْلَهُمْ بِالْكَثِيرِ،

wa yaa man kaafaa qaleelahum bil-katheer

O He who recompenses with the much their little!

وَيَا مَنْ ضَمِنَ لَهُمْ إجَابَةَ الدُّعاءِ،

wa yaa man z''amina lahum ijaabatad-dua'aa-i

O He who has made himself accountable to them to respond to supplication!

وَيَا مَنْ وَعَدَهُمْ عَلَى نَفْسِهِ بِتَفَضُّلِهِ حُسْنَ الْجَزاءِ،

wa yaa maw-waa'dahum a'laa naf-sihee bitafaz''-z''ulihee h'us-nal-jazaaa-i

O He who pledged Himself by His gratuitous bounty to give them excellent repayment!

مَا أَنَا بِأَعْصَى مَنْ عَصَاكَ فَغَفَرْتَ لَهُ،

maaa ana bia'-s'aa man a's'aaka faghafar-ta lah

I am not the most disobedient of those who have disobeyed Thee

وَمَا أَنَا بِأَلْوَمِ مَنِ اعْتَذَرَ إلَيْكَ فَقَبِلْتَ مِنْهُ،

wa maaa ana bil-wami mani aa'-tad'ara ilay-ka faqabil-ta min-h

and whom Thou hast forgiven, nor am I the most blameworthy to offer excuses which Thou hast accepted,

وَمَا أَنَا بِأَظْلَمِ مَنْ تَابَ إلَيْكَ فَعُدْتَ عَلَيْهِ ،

wa maaa ana biz'-lami man taaba ilay-ka fau't-ta a'lay-h

nor am I the most wrongdoing of those who have repented to Thee, and to whom Thou hast returned

أَتُوبُ إلَيْكَ فِي مَقَامِي هَذَا تَوْبَةَ نَادِم عَلَى مَا فَرَطَ مِنْهُ

atoobu ilay-ka fee maqaamee had'aa taw-bata naadimin a'laa maa farat'a min-h

I repent to Thee in this my station, the repentance of one remorseful over what preceded from him

مُشْفِق مِمَّا اجْتَمَعَ عَلَيْهِ خَالِصِ الْحَيَاءِ مِمَّا وَقَعَ فِيْهِ ،

mush-fiqim-mim-maj-tamaa' a'lay-h khaalis'il-h'ayaaa-i mim-maa waqaa' feeh

hastily, apprehensive of what has gathered around him, pure in shame for that into which he has fallen,

عَالِم بِأَنَّ الْعَفْوَ عَنِ الذَّنْبِ الْعَظِيمِ لاَ يَتَعـاظَمُكَ،

a'alimin bian-nal-a'f-wa a'nid'-d'ambil-a'z'eemi laa yataa'az'amuk

knowing that pardoning great sins is nothing great for Thee.

وَأَنَّ التَّجَـاوُزَ عَنِ الإثْمِ الْجَلِيْلِ لا يَسْتَصْعِبُكَ ،

wa an-nat-tajaawuza a'nil-ith-mil-jaleeli laa yas-tas'-i'buk

overlooking enormous misdeeds is not difficult for thee

وَأَنَّ احْتِمَالَ الْجنَايَاتِ الْفَـاحِشَةِ لا يَتَكَأَّدُكَ،

wa an-na ah'-timaalal-jinaayaatil-faah'ishati laa yatakaa-aduk

putting up with indecent crimes does not trouble Thee,

وَأَنَّ أَحَبَّ عِبَادِكَ إلَيْكَ مَنْ تَرَكَ الاسْتِكْبَارَ عَلَيْكَ،

wa an-na ah'ab-ba i'baadika ilay-ka man tarakalis-tik-baara a'lay-k

and the most beloved of Thy servants to Thee is he who refrains from arrogance before thee

وَجَانَبَ الإِصْرَارَ، وَلَزِمَ الاسْتِغْفَارَ.

wa jaanabal-is'-raar wa lazimalis-tigh-faar

pulls aside from persistence, and holds fast to praying forgiveness!

وَأَنَا أَبْرَأُ إلَيْكَ مِنْ أَنْ أَسْتَكْبِرَ،

wa ana ab-ra-u ilay-ka min sn ss-tak-bir

I am clear before Thee of arrogance,

وَأَعُوذُ بِكَ مِنْ أَنْ أصِـرَّ.

wa su'wd'u bika min sn us'ir

I seek refuge in Thee from persistence,

وَأَسْتَغْفِرُكَ لِمَا قَصَّرْتُ فِيهِ ،

was-tagh-firuka limaa qas'-s'ar-tu feeh

I pray forgiveness from Thee for shortcomings,

وَأَسْتَعِينُ بِكَ عَلَى مَا عَجَزْتُ عَنْهُ.

wa as-tae'enu bika a'laa maa a'jaz-tu a'n-h

I seek help from Thee in incapacity!

اللَّهُمَّ صَلِّ عَلَى مُحَمَّد وَآلِهِ

al-laahum-ma s'al-li a'laa muh'am-madiw-wa aaalih

O God bless Muhammad and his Household,

وَهَبْ لِي مَا يَجبُ عَلَيَّ لَكَ ،

wa hab lee maa yajibu a'lay-ya lak

dispense with what is incumbent upon me toward Thee,

وَعَافِنِي مِمَّا أَسْتَوْجِبُهُ مِنْكَ،

wa a'afinee mim-maaa as-taw-jibuhoo mink

release me from what I merit from Thee,

وَأجِرْنِي مِمَّا يَخَافُهُ أَهْلُ الإساءَةِ

wa ajir-nee mim-maa yakhaafuhooo ah-lul-isaaa-ah

and grant me sanctuary from what the evildoers fear!

فَإنَّكَ مَلِيءٌ بِالْعَفْوِ، مَرْجُوٌّ لِلْمَغْفِرَةِ، مَعْرُوفٌ بِالتَّجَاوُزِ ،

fa in-naka malee-um-bil-a'f-w mar-joo-wu lil-magh-firah maa'-roofum-bit-tajaawz

For Thou art full of pardon, the hoped-for source of forgiveness, well known for Thy forbearance.

لَيْسَ لِحَاجَتِي مَطْلَبٌ سِوَاكَ ،

lay-sa lih'aajatee mat'-labun siwaak

My need has no object but Thee,

وَلا لِذَنْبِي غَافِرٌ غَيْرُكَ، حَاشَاكَ

wa laa lid'ambee ghaafirun ghay-ruk h'aashaak

my sin no forgiver other than Thee - could that be possible?

وَلاَ أَخَافُ عَلَى نَفْسِي إلاّ إيَّاكَ

wa laaa akhaafu a'laa naf-seee il-laaa ee-yaak

I have no fear for myself except from Thee;

إنَّكَ أَهْلُ التَّقْوَى وَأَهْلُ الْمَغْفِرَةِ .

in-naka ah-lut-taq-waa wa ah-lul-magh-firah

Thou art worthy of reverential fear, and worthy to forgive!

صَلِّ عَلَى مُحَمَّد وَآلِ مُحَمَّد،

s'al-li a'laa muh'am-madiw-waaali muh'am-mad

Bless Muhammad and his Household,

وَاقْض حَاجَتِي وَأَنْجِحْ طَلِبَتِي،

wa aq-z''i h'aajatee wa anjih' t'alibatee

grant my need,answer my request favorably,

وَاغْفِرْ ذَنْبِي، وَآمِنْ خَوْفَ نَفْسِيْ

wagh-fir d'ambee wa aaamin khaw-fa naf-see

forgive my sin and give me security from fear for myself!

إنَّكَ عَلَى كُلِّ شَيْء قَدِيرٌ

in-naka a'laa kul-li shay-in qadeer

Thou art powerful over everything,

وَذلِكَ عَلَيْكَ يَسِيرٌ آمِينَ رَبَّ الْعَالَمِينَ .

wa d'alika a'lay-ka yaseer aaameena rab-bal-a'alameen

and that is easy for Thee.Amen, Lord of the worlds